A reverse Kegel is the deliberate relaxation and gentle lengthening of the pelvic floor muscles, the opposite of the squeezing contraction most men associate with a standard Kegel. Instead of tightening, you consciously “let go” and allow those muscles to release and drop slightly downward. The technique sounds simple, but most men have never practiced intentional pelvic floor relaxation, and the movement can feel surprisingly elusive at first. Getting it right involves coordinating your breath, avoiding common mistakes like bearing down or straining, and understanding what the release should actually feel like in your body.
What You Are Actually Relaxing
The pelvic floor is a group of muscles that spans the base of your pelvis like a hammock, running from your pubic bone in front to your tailbone in back. In men, these muscles support the bladder and bowel, wrap around the base of the penis, and play a role in urination, bowel movements, erections, and ejaculation. The muscles involved include both voluntary skeletal muscle (the kind you can consciously squeeze and release) and smooth muscle structures that work more automatically. Research on male pelvic anatomy has identified a complex series of smooth muscle structures continuous with the rectal musculature, including bundles between the external anal sphincter and the bulbospongiosus muscle and a rectourethral muscle connecting the rectum and urethra.1PubMed Central. The series of smooth muscle structures in the pelvic floors of men: Dynamic coordination of smooth and skeletal muscles You do not need to memorize these structures, but it helps to know that the pelvic floor is not a single on-off switch. It is a layered network that can hold tension in ways you may not be fully aware of.
When you do a standard Kegel, you contract these muscles as if you were stopping the flow of urine midstream or holding back gas. A reverse Kegel asks you to do the opposite: gently expand and release those same muscles, letting them lengthen rather than tighten. The goal is to reduce your resting muscle tone, meaning the baseline level of tension your pelvic floor carries even when you are not actively clenching.2Frontiers. A proposed anxiety–hypertonic pelvic floor axis in postpartum women: a narrative review of mechanistic links and rehabilitation implications – Section: 7.4 Relaxation-oriented physical therapy: reverse Kegels and diaphragmatic breathing training
How to Perform a Reverse Kegel Step by Step
Start by lying on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. This position takes gravity out of the equation and makes it easier to isolate the pelvic floor without recruiting your abs or glutes. Once you are comfortable with the movement lying down, you can progress to sitting and eventually standing.
Take a slow, deep breath in through your nose, directing the air down into your belly rather than up into your chest. As your diaphragm drops and your belly expands, your pelvic floor naturally descends and lengthens slightly. This is the movement you want to amplify. As you inhale, gently encourage a sense of opening or dropping in the area between your sit bones. Some men find it helpful to imagine the perineum (the area between the scrotum and the anus) softening and expanding outward, as if you were about to begin urinating but without actually pushing.
On the exhale, let the pelvic floor return to its resting position passively. Do not squeeze or clench on the way back up. The exhale is neutral, not active. That is the key difference from a standard Kegel, where the exhale is often used to drive the contraction. Here, the inhale is where the work happens, and the exhale is simply a reset.
Hold the relaxed, open position for about five seconds during each inhale before letting your breath out naturally. Repeat this for eight to ten breaths. Two or three sets per day is a reasonable starting point. The movement should feel subtle. If you feel like you are pushing hard or bearing down as though forcing a bowel movement, you have gone too far and are straining rather than relaxing.
Why Breathing Is Central to the Technique
The connection between your diaphragm and your pelvic floor is not just a useful analogy; it is built into how these muscles move. The pelvic floor muscles naturally relax during inhalation and contract during exhalation, working in sync with the diaphragm and the abdominal wall.3PubMed Central. Breathing, (S)Training and the Pelvic Floor-A Basic Concept When you take a deep diaphragmatic breath, the diaphragm descends and gently increases pressure in the abdomen. That pressure encourages the pelvic floor to lengthen eccentrically, stretching as it lowers.2Frontiers. A proposed anxiety–hypertonic pelvic floor axis in postpartum women: a narrative review of mechanistic links and rehabilitation implications – Section: 7.4 Relaxation-oriented physical therapy: reverse Kegels and diaphragmatic breathing training
This is why shallow chest breathing undermines the whole exercise. If your breath stays high in your rib cage and your belly does not expand, the diaphragm barely moves and the pelvic floor gets no cue to release. Practicing diaphragmatic breathing on its own, even outside of dedicated reverse Kegel sessions, can help lower pelvic floor resting tone over time. Slow, deep breathing has also been associated with increased activity of the vagus nerve, which shifts your nervous system away from its fight-or-flight mode and toward a calmer baseline, further helping tight muscles let go.
The Difference Between Relaxing and Straining
This is the single most important distinction to understand, and the one men get wrong most often. Bearing down, as if you were trying to force out a bowel movement, is not a reverse Kegel. It is straining, and it creates a very different movement pattern in the pelvic floor. Research comparing the Valsalva maneuver (bearing down against a closed airway) with a straining maneuver found that they produce opposite pelvic floor movements: during a Valsalva, the pelvic floor actually moves upward in sync with the diaphragm, while during a straining push, the pelvic floor is displaced sharply downward.4PubMed. Proof of concept: differential effects of Valsalva and straining maneuvers on the pelvic floor
A reverse Kegel sits between these two extremes. You are not forcefully pushing anything down. You are releasing tension and allowing a gentle descent driven by your breath. Think of it less like pushing and more like unfurling. If your face is scrunching, your abs are bracing, or you feel pressure building in your head, you are straining. Dial it back. The sensation should feel like a softening, not an effort. Some men describe it as the feeling just before urination starts, or the moment you finally relax after holding tension in your shoulders all day, except lower.
Why Many Men Need Relaxation More Than Strengthening
Most public awareness of pelvic floor exercise focuses on Kegels and strengthening, which makes sense for issues like urinary incontinence after prostate surgery. But a surprisingly large number of men carry excess tension in their pelvic floor without knowing it. A population-based study of nearly 200 men found that only about one in five had completely normal pelvic floor muscle function. Among men who reported no symptoms at all, 80% still showed some degree of muscle dysfunction on assessment.5PubMed Central. Exploring pelvic floor muscle function in men with and without pelvic floor symptoms: A population‐based study That dysfunction can include muscles that are too tight, too weak, poorly coordinated, or some combination.
For men whose pelvic floor is already overactive or hypertonic, doing standard Kegels can actually make things worse. One study on men with chronic pelvic pain syndrome found that many patients had overactive musculature that required relaxation rather than strengthening, and that Kegels worsened symptoms in some of these men.6PubMed Central. Comprehensive pelvic floor physical therapy program for men with idiopathic chronic pelvic pain syndrome: a prospective study This is one reason the reverse Kegel exists: for a meaningful portion of men, the problem is not weakness but the inability to fully let go.
Chronic Pelvic Pain and the Inability to Relax
Chronic prostatitis and chronic pelvic pain syndrome (CP/CPPS) affect a significant number of men and can cause pain in the perineum, lower abdomen, or genitals, along with urinary symptoms and sexual difficulties. A key finding in research on this condition is that men with CP/CPPS have measurably higher resting tension in their pelvic floor muscles compared to men without pain. Surface electromyography studies show that men with chronic pelvic pain have greater baseline hypertonicity and instability in their pelvic floor muscles at rest.7PubMed. Pelvic floor electromyography in men with chronic pelvic pain syndrome: a case-control study
Even more telling, men with CP/CPPS struggle to return their pelvic floor to a relaxed state after contracting it. One study found that after performing a pelvic floor contraction, men with CP/CPPS showed resting muscle activity about 13% higher than their baseline, while healthy controls showed no such increase.8PubMed Central. Impaired Ability to Relax Pelvic Floor Muscles in Men With Chronic Prostatitis/Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome In other words, their muscles clench and then do not fully release. Over time, this creates a feedback loop of tension and pain. The reverse Kegel directly targets this problem by training the muscles to release on command.
Comprehensive pelvic floor physical therapy programs that include relaxation techniques, myofascial release, and biofeedback have shown meaningful results in this population. One prospective study found that half the men who completed such a program had robust symptom improvement, with another 20% showing moderate improvement, and none getting worse.6PubMed Central. Comprehensive pelvic floor physical therapy program for men with idiopathic chronic pelvic pain syndrome: a prospective study Research has also supported the investigation of personalized physical therapy approaches that emphasize the ability to relax pelvic floor muscles as a mechanism for reducing pain.8PubMed Central. Impaired Ability to Relax Pelvic Floor Muscles in Men With Chronic Prostatitis/Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome
Sexual Health Applications
Pelvic floor relaxation plays a direct role in both erections and ejaculatory control. During sexual arousal, the pelvic floor muscles need to relax to allow blood to fill the penis and produce an erection. Sustaining that erection requires a coordinated interplay of tension and relaxation at the base of the penis. Any disruption in this coordination, whether from muscles that are too tight or too weak, can impair sexual function.9International Journal of Impotence Research. Pelvic physical therapy for male sexual disorders: a narrative review This means that men who carry chronic pelvic floor tension may experience erectile difficulties not because of vascular problems but because their muscles will not let go enough to allow normal blood flow.
For premature ejaculation, pelvic floor muscle training that includes both contraction and relaxation exercises has shown strong results. In one study, over 80% of men with lifelong premature ejaculation who completed a 12-week pelvic floor rehabilitation program gained control of their ejaculatory reflex, increasing their average time to ejaculation from under a minute to over two minutes. Among those followed up six months later, the improvement held.10PubMed Central. Pelvic floor muscle rehabilitation for patients with lifelong premature ejaculation: a novel therapeutic approach An integrative review of the broader literature on pelvic floor training for premature ejaculation confirmed that these interventions consistently improve ejaculatory control, providing sustained benefits without the side effects of medication.11The Journal of Sexual Medicine. EFFICACY OF PELVIC FLOOR MUSCLE TRAINING AND KEGEL EXERCISES IN THE TREATMENT OF PREMATURE EJACULATION: AN INTEGRATIVE LITERATURE REVIEW
The logic of the reverse Kegel in this context is that learning to relax the pelvic floor on demand gives you a tool to use during sex. If you can recognize rising tension in those muscles and consciously release it, you may be able to delay the ejaculatory reflex. Meanwhile, men with chronic pelvic pain who also experience sexual dysfunction, including ejaculatory pain and erectile issues, have seen sexual symptom improvements ranging from 77% to 87% after programs built around trigger point release and relaxation training.12PubMed. Sexual dysfunction in men with chronic prostatitis/chronic pelvic pain syndrome: improvement after trigger point release and paradoxical relaxation training
How to Tell If You Are Doing It Correctly
Without professional assessment, the feedback loop for reverse Kegels is admittedly limited. But there are a few self-checks that help. First, place a finger gently on your perineum (the soft tissue between the scrotum and anus) while practicing. During a standard Kegel contraction, you should feel the tissue lift and tighten under your finger. During a reverse Kegel, you should feel a slight softening and a subtle bulging or dropping of that tissue. If you feel nothing changing, you may not be engaging the right muscles yet.
Second, try performing the movement while urinating. A standard Kegel will slow or stop the stream. A reverse Kegel should maintain or gently increase the flow. This is a diagnostic tool only, not something to practice regularly, because habitually interrupting urination can itself create dysfunction.
For more precise feedback, clinical tools exist. Biofeedback using a rectal electromyography probe can measure pelvic floor resting tone and provide real-time guidance during both contraction and relaxation exercises.13PubMed. The effect of biofeedback physical therapy in men with Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome Type III In clinical settings, ultrasound imaging, surface electromyography, and anorectal manometry have all been used to assess pelvic floor muscle function in men, with increased resting tone and reduced endurance identified as the most common findings.14The Journal of Women’s & Pelvic Health Physical Therapy. Biofeedback Measures of Pelvic Floor Muscle Contraction, Relaxation, and Resting Tone for Males With and Without Chronic Pelvic Pain: A Scoping Review If you suspect your pelvic floor is chronically tight and self-guided practice is not helping, biofeedback with a pelvic floor therapist can shorten the learning curve considerably.
The Role of Stress and Posture
Pelvic floor tension does not exist in isolation. Psychological stress is increasingly recognized as a driver of chronic pelvic floor tightness. Growing evidence connects psychological stress to symptom onset and persistence in chronic pelvic pain by affecting autonomic nervous system function and pelvic floor muscle activity.15Mansoura Medical Journal. The Association between Stress-related disorders and Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome in males: A Narrative Review Long-term anxiety and depression can trigger a cascade of changes that increase sympathetic nerve activity to the smooth muscles around the prostate, bladder, and penile tissue, causing spasm and chronic contraction.16Frontiers in Psychology. Evaluation of psychological stress, cortisol awakening response, and heart rate variability in patients with chronic prostatitis/chronic pelvic pain syndrome complicated by lower urinary tract symptoms and erectile dysfunction If you are someone who clenches your jaw when stressed, tenses your shoulders at your desk, or holds your breath during difficult conversations, there is a good chance your pelvic floor is doing something similar without your knowledge.
Posture matters too. Research on sitting positions and pelvic floor activity has found that posture substantially changes how active these muscles are. Moving from a relaxed slumped sitting position to a very upright, tall posture more than tripled pelvic floor muscle activation in one study.17PubMed. Sitting posture affects pelvic floor muscle activity in parous women: an observational study While that study was conducted in women, the principle applies broadly: the position of your pelvis affects the resting state of the muscles within it. Men who sit rigidly upright for hours at a desk or who carry their pelvis in a chronically tucked-under position may be inadvertently keeping their pelvic floor engaged all day. Practicing reverse Kegels in a slightly reclined or gently supported sitting position, rather than bolt upright, can make it easier to find the release.
Building a Balanced Routine
A reverse Kegel is not meant to replace standard Kegels entirely. The two work as complements. Pelvic floor exercise is defined as training to improve strength, power, endurance, relaxation, or a combination of these.18PubMed Central. Pelvic floor muscle exercise and training for coping with urinary incontinence A well-functioning pelvic floor needs to be able to contract strongly when required and then fully relax afterward. The problem arises when men only ever train the contraction side and never practice the release.
A practical daily routine might look like this:
- Morning: Two to three minutes of diaphragmatic breathing in a lying or reclined position, focusing on pelvic floor release with each inhale. Eight to ten breath cycles per set.
- Midday: A brief check-in while sitting. Take five slow breaths and consciously release any pelvic floor tension you notice. This is especially useful if you have been sitting at a desk for hours.
- Evening: A combined session of five standard Kegel contractions (squeeze, hold five seconds, release) followed by five reverse Kegels (inhale, release, hold the open position for five seconds, exhale passively). This trains both directions of the movement.
If you are dealing with pelvic pain or suspect your muscles are chronically tight, lean more heavily toward the relaxation work and minimize or temporarily stop standard Kegels until a professional can assess your baseline tone. For men recovering from prostate surgery or dealing with incontinence, standard Kegels will usually be the priority, with reverse Kegels added later to ensure the muscles do not become hypertonic from aggressive strengthening.
Stretches and Movements That Support Pelvic Floor Relaxation
Reverse Kegels work best as part of a broader effort to release tension in the muscles surrounding the pelvis. The pelvic floor does not operate independently; it connects functionally to the hip flexors, adductors (inner thigh muscles), glutes, and deep abdominal muscles. If those surrounding muscles are chronically tight, the pelvic floor often follows suit.
Stretches that open the hips and lengthen the inner thighs can help create conditions for pelvic floor relaxation. Deep squatting positions, where you sit low with your knees wide and your heels on the ground, gently stretch the pelvic floor and encourage a lengthened resting position. Happy baby pose, where you lie on your back and hold the outsides of your feet with your knees drawn wide toward your armpits, is another position that opens the pelvic floor. Child’s pose with wide knees combines a hip stretch with a posture that naturally encourages diaphragmatic breathing into the belly and lower back.
General physical activity also appears helpful. Research on men with chronic pelvic pain found that both specific pelvic floor stretching and general aerobic exercise produced significant symptom reductions.6PubMed Central. Comprehensive pelvic floor physical therapy program for men with idiopathic chronic pelvic pain syndrome: a prospective study Walking, swimming, and other low-impact aerobic activities increase blood flow to the pelvis and can help down-regulate the nervous system’s tendency to keep muscles guarded.
When to See a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist
Self-guided reverse Kegels are a reasonable starting point for men who are generally healthy and simply want better pelvic floor awareness. But certain situations call for professional guidance. If you have persistent pelvic pain, painful urination or ejaculation, urinary urgency or hesitancy that does not improve, or erectile difficulties that do not seem to have a clear medical cause, a pelvic floor physical therapist can perform a proper assessment. These therapists use both manual examination and tools like surface electromyography or real-time ultrasound to evaluate whether your pelvic floor is too tight, too weak, or poorly coordinated, and they can tailor a program accordingly.14The Journal of Women’s & Pelvic Health Physical Therapy. Biofeedback Measures of Pelvic Floor Muscle Contraction, Relaxation, and Resting Tone for Males With and Without Chronic Pelvic Pain: A Scoping Review
Pelvic floor physical therapy for men is less widely discussed than for women, but the research supporting it has grown substantially. Evidence suggests a close relationship between the pelvic floor and male sexual dysfunction as well as pelvic pain, with a clear therapeutic benefit from targeted pelvic floor therapy.19PubMed. The Role of Pelvic Floor Muscles in Male Sexual Dysfunction and Pelvic Pain The biggest barrier for most men is not the lack of available treatment but the assumption that pelvic floor issues are exclusively a women’s health concern. They are not, and seeking help for them is increasingly straightforward.